My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Randomize
