We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
this will be a night to untag.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
