I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.