I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
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