Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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