im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
