We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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