I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
Randomize
