It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize