I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize