my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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