Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
