Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
how does that bad decision feel?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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