um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
