Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
