One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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