I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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