hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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