I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
no you cant smoke seaweed
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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