hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
