Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
it was like having sex with a tree stump
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
