Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
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