He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
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of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
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You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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