i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
