that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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