based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
