Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize