You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
