i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Randomize
