Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
my sisters under your porch take her home
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
