just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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