Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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