good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
