I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
