I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
there is puke in my bra ... again
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
