why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
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He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
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I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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