I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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