That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
