You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
