i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize