i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
