Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Randomize
