Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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