Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
