Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
