i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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