That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize