i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
