dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
