Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
